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I ran across this video on Facebook Friday night. Around 11:30. I had just posted a status update about finally clearing out my inbox…managed to answer and reply to all of my email, file what needed filing and finally delete some things that were just taking up space. I’m down to two remaining emails, y’all. I feel liberated.
I was headed to bed, but I got sidetracked looking at one of my college roommates recent wedding photos. Don’t you love how Facebook allows us to see glimpses into people’s lives when we can’t be near the people we love? Anyway…as with any social media site, I somehow started jumping around from profile to profile; reading stalking and looking at photos, when a video caught my eye. I don’t do YouTube videos too terribly often, but this one got my attention. I’ve placed it below. Take a second to watch (it’s 3:00-ish minutes…I’m sure you can spare it and it’s worth it).
Josh and I have talked about this very thing time and time again in our lives. This is a topic that gets me fired up and ready to start shouting. If I’d been in the room when someone started talking about this, I’d have been one of those women shouting hearty “Amens” and “Praise Jesus!”
I’ve been part of places where the moment you let your weakness show…admit to your shortcomings…let on that you aren’t perfect like Christian’s are “supposed” to be…everything changes. I’ve been on the receiving end of those judgmental stares. On the other side of the room when the whispers start. Been the brunt of an indirect but oh-so-obvious Facebook status.
It hurts.
And it’s wrong.
If you don’t know my story, let me give you a quick rundown:
I drank myself to the point in college where I should have ended up dead. Not only did I drink to an extent that I was an alcoholic at not even 20 years old, waking up hungover and spending the day itching for the evening when I’d party it up again, but I was also foolish with my choices…looking to hookup with whoever I could, whenever I could. Trying to find acceptance through popularity and doing what the “popular” girls did.
How I didn’t end up dead in an alcohol related car wreck or pregnant with an illegitimate child, is by God’s grace only. And it’s only by God’s grace that I’m still here and have reached the point in my life where I am comfortable sharing my mistakes and hoping that others learn from them.
But you know what? Those mistakes? Those stupid choices?
We ALL have baggage. We all need grace.
If we didn’t, then the cross? The cross is meaningless.
I’m not bashing the church or saying we don’t need the church. God gave us the church-the body of believers we are supposed to come together with to worship and fellowship-as a gift. But, it’s been the church-the building, the body of believers thumping the scripture over people’s heads-that has led people away.
It’s the church that’s left me feeling many times over like I don’t want to be a Christian anymore.
Because as unfortunate as it is, “christianity” isn’t the same today as it was when Jesus Christ walked this earth.
Christianity isn’t a once a week (twice if you go on Wednesday’s) thing to just check off your list.
It’s not driving the most expensive car, to the most prestigious building, wearing the top of the line name brand clothes and sitting in the front row singing louder than anyone else, interjecting the “amen” in the right spot.
It’s not knowing or memorizing the most scripture or being able to understand Hebrew.
It’s not knowing the Books of the Bible or having the most verses highlighted on those tissue paper thin pages (Bonus points if you use something like the inductive method with all kinds of different colors, all coordinated in accordance to subject matter.)
It’s not looking the other direction when a brother or sister in Christ is struggling and needs your help. It’s not passing judgement or condemning someone over a bad choice or even a series of bad choices. Last time I read the Easter story, I’m pretty sure Peter denied Christ…not once, not twice, but three times.
Jesus rode a donkey. Not a Porsche. He wore a robe and sandals. Not Chanel and Jimmy Choo’s. He carried with Him the presence of the Almighty. Not a Michael Kors bag.
Jesus associated with the least of these so that we could have the greatest of his grace.
In fact Jesus was the least of these. Dig your Bible out and read-really read– about who Jesus was. Because he wasn’t who the churches seem be depicting him to be these days.
A church is fine. Going to church is fantastic. My family and I go every week.
But, who do you see in church? Your friends? Family members? People you associate with? Families that are part of the school attached to the church? Upstanding citizens of your city?
Do you see the least of these? Do you see the barstool type people? Do you see the broken, beaten and bruised souls that are all around us? Do you see the Vets holding the signs outside your local fast food place? Do you see the homeless man you always pass by, but manage to “turn the other cheek” to?
We aren’t too good to reach them. We aren’t too good to associate with them.
When did becoming a Christian…becoming a church member…take us from being ONE of the least of these, to thinking we were the BETTER of these?
The Bible tells us in the book of 1 John that all wrongdoing is sin (src).
Not some of it.
Not just a little bit of it.
ALL of it.
There’s no good sin and bad sin.
No right sin or wrong sin.
No little sin or big sin.
It’s ALL sin.
From that little white lie to the adultery. From stealing a pencil from your office (that wasn’t yours!) to murdering half a dozen people.
It all put Christ on the cross.
It all kept Christ on the cross.
And at the end of the day, when I stand before God at those pearly gates, I know that I will answer for the mistakes that I have made (and heaven knows there’s been a lot of them). I know that I will have to give an account of all the wrong doing in my life.
But when all of my transgressions are counted and the great and mighty Lord of Lords gets ready to place his verdict? I want to be sure that I hear him say, “Well done my good and faithful servant.”
If I have to be the “too good of these” to engage with the least of these, then how much like Jesus am I really?
Prostitutes.
Adulterers.
Tax collectors.
Lowly fishermen.
Shepherds who shot slingshots.
Blasphemers.
Thieves.
Murderers.
These don’t sound like the high society type to me.
And if associating with them makes me more like HIM…then that’s right where I want to be.
Because when Christianity becomes about being better than the ones who need to hear the good news of Jesus Christ, then I don’t want to be a Christian anymore.
Have you ever been on the receiving end of a church’s (or Christians) criticism and judgment? How did you feel? Are you under the impression that that’s what Jesus Christ is like? If it is, I’d love talk to you more about who my God is and what he is really like!
Thank you so much for sharing the video and your story. You are so right with your words about us as Chrisitians/church members. As a Youth Pastor I’ve challenged our students to be “Christ-followers”. Step up and be set apart…striving to be like JESUS. “Everyone” claims to be a “Christian” these days…being a “Christ follower” sets the tone for a different standard…to be like Jesus…live like Him, walk like Him, talk like Him, love like Him, serve like Him. If we are going to impact our world we have to be different. We must live by God’s Word, His truth…not the world’s standards.
Thanks again for sharing!
Live a Life that matters
I walk into church and criticism starts.. They say I’m a rebel for missing two months of church because I was volunteering at a theater for school. My cousin told me that I wasn’t allowed to do a special with the dance ministry because I was rebellious, they sent my 14yr old cousin to tell me, they couldn’t even tell me.
After I left church I never got a message or a knock on my front door from the pastors. They all just left me behind like I was never there for 5yrs. So I started going to parties and I got drunk and forgot about God.. Than one day I wake up on a sunny day and my mom looked really tired and she told me that she was bleeding fr her uterus..
I broke into tears when she left to the store.. My mom had cancer 9yrs ago and now this.?? I was furious with God I didn’t want to go to church.. He was taking my m away either way and it hurt.. Still hurts.
That night I prayed after 4 long months of nothing with God I prayed and for weeks on end till now I can’t sleep and I know God has me awake.. I started going to church again but its not the same..
When I walked into that church I felt out of place the stares comments smirks hurt but I stayed and listened and I came out hurt.. The thing is I go for God not the people, just that how am I suppose to be blessed and enjoy church and my time with God when I feel uncomfortable knowing everyone there is just judging me. How am I suppose to be there praying and showing God I need him more than anything when everyone is stepping on me and trying to tear me to pieces in church?? I need advice because at 16 I shouldn’t be where I am I should be in another path.. Help me because I reach out for help and I never receive it..
Blanca
Churches are filled with people and all people sin. My suggestion is to find a different church, one where you feel God’s love, compassion and Grace. And please read this writers post called “I don’t want to be a Christian”. She describes God’s love perfectly and some of the ” issues” some churches have. I promise you that there are many churches filled with accepting, loving people. Pray to God to show you the right church and he will. I did that 5 years ago and I LOVE my church and my church family. I will pray for you too. God bless you
I have been, not doubting God, but just trying to understand his glory more. I grew up in church and I’ve always believed in him as my savior, which I know he is. I’m just seeing things all over social media that is making me question some things..I just hope God doesn’t hate me for questioning him.
God doesn’t hate anyone or anything……he’s hurt by things, gets angry by things, but in the end he is a LOVING God. Please don’t ever forget that!!!!
You are so right on target. I was a pastors wife for over 20 years. I suffered so many years at the hands of Christians, that the pressures became so great it ended my marriage. I would like to share my experienes more offline.
What an awesome video! Thank you for sharing!
That was very beautifully written. I have made my share of mistakes and I know I am not perfect. I am still looking for that church that does not hold that against me. I want to be welcomed home by Jesus. I know I still do things wrong and there are times I question how strong I am but I get through because of him. It reminds me of my favorite poem footprints, when I looked back at all the tough times and saw one set of footprints in the sand the lord said it was then that I carried you. I know I left out a lot from the poem but I know he has carried me through my tough times. I will always pray that he continues to do so.
I try to love everyone , I’m a christian
Great message and I really liked your format as well. Keep up the good work. I wish I could have coped and paste my comment to Facebook on here, but it’s kinda long. Anyway, thanks again.
Your article is well written and understandably on mark. I have just recently found my faith again (a year ago), and absolutely love the church my husband attend. I had attended many through my life, and none made me feel welcome or like I belonged there. It’s frustrating and makes you want to bang your head against the wall. But last year I actually opened my heart and gave my church a chance. Immediately i felt so welcomed and loved, as well as my husband.
Some back ground here. My husband and I are covered in tattoos, I am also pierced. My husband was convicted of murder and spent 23 years in prison.
Our church has taken us in without question and accepted us. They have gone out of their way to help my husband adjust back into society. Now my husband and I, as well as others members of our church go out and help with community projects, and people in need. We go out of our way to smile and say hello to everyone we cross paths with.
I tell you this so you know and can remember that not all Christians are about status. Some of us hold to our roots and know we are to serve our fellow man. Bless you and your achievements, and I hope you find the same wonderful feelings my husband and I have been so blessed to find.
Stumbled upon one of your posts through Facebook and love how you express your views, very sincere and no sugar coating in order to be PC. We are who we are, but not many can stand behind that thought. Thank you for genuinely expressing your views, too much BS and reterick on social media these days, was nice to “find” your messages❤️