Wifey Wednesdays

This is the first time I have joined in for this meme, but I thought it looked like it might be fun, so I am going to give it a shot. Sheila over at “To Love, Honor and Vaccum”  hosts it weekly and also gives some pretty fabulous and practical marriage advice. I couldn’t really say much on today’s topic {Which, I won’t share with you so you will have to go to her blog and check it out! Haha!} So instead, I thought I would just write about how the marriage thing works around here for us.

Josh and I have a really good marriage. We both decided BEFORE we got married that divorce wasn’t an option at all for us, and that we would work through everything if we had an issue. This isn’t to say that our relationship is without its bumps and rough spots, because that is surely not the case. We just know when we argue that we aren’t going to let it turn into anything major. We know what sets the other off, and usually tend to avoid it.

We are partners and try to share responsibility as equally as possible. He works all day, everyday, sometimes 12-14 hours at a time. When he gets home, I don’t expect him to clean up or cook supper or do laundry. How fair would that be? It’s understood that I will keep the house clean and do the cooking for us. Why not? I’m not working to provide an actual income, so why wouldn’t I take care of things around the house? Give him a clean house to come home to after a long days work, and a hot meal to eat?

The thing is, he helps out. He doesn’t do laundry. I’ll admit that. But most nights, he helps me clean up the kitchen after supper [which is my absolute least favorite thing to do in the house], and he will give the baby his bath a lot of times [Noah usually doesn’t eat without needing a bath…especially after supper]. He doesn’t always expect me to do it. Which is the best part…not feeling like I am expected to do it all. He shares most of the parenting duties. I will admit that I usually feed Noah at every meal [if it’s something he can’t feed himself] because Josh, bless his heart, can not multi task…AT ALL.

It’s a good partnership. One that works for us.

There are some areas that we could work on. We could definitely use some improvement in our area of communication. It’s not that either of us are completely out of the loop with what’s going on in the others life, we just don’t take nor always HAVE the time to talk like we want. We have a child. Of course the Quiet time that we had as newly weds is pretty much gone. And by the time Josh gets home, supper gets cooked and the kitchen gets cleaned, and we give Noah a bath and put him to bed, it’s 7:00 or 8:00…and after a long day for both of us, we both want to collapse on the couch and watch TV or play on the computer or just go to bed. We are working on it.

We also need to make more “us” time…date nights. Again, we are working on it. It’s hard to find a babysitter here. There aren’t many people I feel completely comfortable leaving my son with, not to mention, we live on a tight budget [Dave Ramsey? Hello?] and don’t always have the extra money to spend on dinner and a movie. I mean, think about it. Say we eat somewhere like Chili’s or Applebees that does the 2/$20 meals…that averages about $30 by the time you add in drinks [we don’t drink alcohol, but tea or coke is still $2.50 a piece] and a tip. A movie would be about $15 even with our military discount ticket prices. And then a babysitter…about what, $20? $25? So one date night would average out to be about $65 or $70. I could buy some new clothes with that. Or pay bills. Again, lol. WE ARE WORKING ON IT. Trying to start adding it into our budget [but Dave Ramsey and Finances are a totally different post].

Anywho. There ya go. The things that make our marriage work. If I have learned anything about marriage in our first year and a half, it’s that it does take time, patience and a lot of practice to get a good marriage built. It’s not something that happens over night. Eventually the “honeymoon” is over and the real world steps in to try to kick your butt. But, we love each other. Sooo much. No one else in the world I would want to be with. I’m willing to do whatever it takes to make it work. And I know that he is too.

Stop by Sheila’s blog. She has a lot of really fabulous reads! I’ve just discovered her and L.O.V.E. it! I’m getting ready to head home for 10 whole days, so there is a lot of laundry and a lot of cleaning calling my name!

Happy Wednesday! [Only 2 workdays left for this week! Get Excited!]