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You usually never realize when you are about to be hit with one of those “life changing” moments.
More often than not, they sneak up on us, disguised as an unfortunate event, a bad day, or-occasionally-a happy accident that we just didn’t see coming out way. Sometimes we acknowledge their life changing reality immediately, understanding that we are at a crossroads in our life and things will never be the same thing. But, oftentimes we don’t realize the true magnitude of what we are getting into; fail to see the importance of the situation we are present in.
Motherhood was like that for me.
In April of 2008, I was a young newlywed. Back from a week and half long honeymoon in Florida with my new husband. I was tan, trim and in impeccable shape. We were getting ready to move into our first home together and really start our lives as husband and wife. We were looking forward to life in the bigger city of Saint Petersburg and planned to attend concerts, try out the hottest new restaurants, and live up our life as a couple before kids ever came into the picture.
But May 9 changed all of that.
That was the day the test came back positive and our life..my life…took a turn.
I always wanted to be a wife and a mother.
My mom was a stay-at-home parent; always present at our class parties, PTA meetings and sports events.
I dreamed of being that kind of mom to my children.
But not yet.
At just 20 years old, I wasn’t ready to be a mom.
I was scared.
Unprepared.
Wary in my abilities to take care of a tiny baby.
I’d only ever been around a handful of small children, and usually that interaction (even as a teenager) was with another adult present. I was the first of my friends to get married, and definitely the first to get pregnant.
What would I do?
COULD I do it?
I was coming to a crossroads in my life and didn’t even realize.
Until July 8…
They carried me into the sonogram room and I took my first look at the little miracle growing inside of me.
Those first few moments were some of the most surreal moments of my life…
The soft whooshing of his tiny heart, the movement of his little hands and feet inside of me…the realization that this was my son–our son…
It was overwhelming.
Heart stopping.
Life Changing.
My life changed forever that day.
I suddenly realized and knew what it meant to love something with an abundance that would never be measurable. What it really felt like to love someone so much that you would be willing to do anything in the world to keep them from feeling one second of pain, hurt or sadness.
The reality that I was a mom hit me like a half-ton of bricks that day.
Knocking me to a level of joy, delight, fear and abundant love like I had never known before.
He was my crossroad.
My life changer.
And still is.
ABC News recently launched the Million Moms Challenge in conjunction with a variety of media partners, including mom bloggers, in an attempt to improve health for women and children across the world. Take a few minutes to visit the blog, learn about the challenge and take part in the movement. Everyone is entitled to a healthy pregnancy.
[…] I will always, always love you and make sure that you are taken care of. I made myself that promise when I first heard your heartbeat.I promised myself, and you, that no matter what I had to do, no matter what I had to sacrifice or […]
What an amazing recollection. I can imagine how overwhelming that would have been. So much so that you wouldn’t even know what you were getting into. 🙂 Probably a good thing, too. We couldn’t possibly know what it’s like – the hard and the good!
I agree. I don’t think any amount of reading or discussing motherhood with veteran parents can truly prepare you for what it’s really like to have a kid of your own.
They are life-changing, and it’s crazy to think that we used to not have them. Can’t imagine life without my Noah!
I know what you mean. I can’t imagine a life without my baby boy here to share it with. What did we do before our kids came along?
LOL, we slept!
I was 24, but felt the same way. I thought I would be 27 or 28 before I had my first kid! And here I am, 27 about to have my 2nd.
The pregnancy changed everything for Todd & me. It was a hard adjustment, but a glorious one too!
And your little guy is definitely precious!
Thank you, Kate! Having a child definitely brought some changes to our marriage, as well. Most of them were for the better and we had to learn to work through whatever issues arose for the sake of our child. I always assumed I’d be 26 or 27, too. What a surprise it was!
Definitely a life changer- but for the better. 🙂
Exactly. 🙂 Best life changing event EVER.
What a cute little life changer and such a sweet, heart-warming post. You’re one great photographer Courtney!
Aww, thank you!!! You’re too sweet!